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Learn about Power and Control in divorce
Power and control issues may be part of the dynamics of the inter-personal relationship of the marital partners or more significant pathology accompanying complex individual psychological and addiction problems. This is a relationship issue exacerbated by the breakdown of the marriage and the emotional divorce.
Parents who are divorcing come with the baggage of the emotional hurt and anger related to the divorce, and the interplay of beliefs and communication patterning. The communication and conflict resolution is likely to be lacking Either or both parents may say the other is unreasonable. In response, they may take a firm stand that, the other parent, seems unreasonable. Thus, both may appear to be unreasonable to the other. Such perceptions add to their resolve. Standing firm appears to be unreasonable and rigid to others and causes that parent to remain firm and rigid. This pattern is one of self-sustaining conflict. For example one parent is more of a disciplinarian and the other parent becomes more permissive in response. The stricter the one parent becomes, the more permissive the other parent becomes. The extremes are not either?s real positions, but the power and control struggle pushes each into rigid reactions.
One there is identification of this issue as an issue by either party, even if there is a denial of any validity to the claim, both parties should enter into a stipulation prior to proceeding to a regarding evaluation, intervention, monitoring, protections and consequences.
Family lawyers see this pattern repeatedly in a legal dissolution of marriage, whether this is whether a child should attend public or private school, play contact sports, or go to bed a certain hour. The key is to educate the client as to the real issue-power and control, and that it really does not involved the child or parenting. If power and control issues permeate the parents relationship, a professional evaluation may be indicated for many reasons; the parties will benefit from the evaluation findings and recommendations, a plan for future may be developed that serves the best interest of the individuals, the marriage and the children, and, if there is a problem and no compliance with interventions, immediate protections can take place. Ultimately, if it becomes detrimental issue impacting the children?s safety and well being, the evaluation and testimony from the expert will be admissible by prior agreement, if there is any violation of following the expert?s recommendations. It may be that the expert determines that the children need to be evaluated to see if there is damage to them and to determine appropriate treatment and interventions for the children and the entire family.
Immediate and competent intervention and individual and family counseling should be recommended to focus the parties on a solution and new way to interact. The parents need skilful training and education and a refocus to the best interest of the child and the detriment to the child of their course of action. The parties need a well-defined and structured communication plan which can be accomplished through a therapeutic mediation process.
Tags: dissolution of marriage, divorce, divorce control, divorce power, divorce problems
Posted in Children · February 12th, 2010 · Comments (0)
Stage of growth happened in the second year of their life, but this period is also a vital stage for growth and development of toddlers. Even so, obstacles or interference of children’s growth should not be connected with the difficulty to be faced by children in the next age. Some experts discover that there are some things that need special notice in the early growth stage, that is, the first and second year.
Many parents protest that their children always do their activity constantly except when their children were asleep. So many parents often call their children as hyperactive children when they consult with an expert. But the experts tell that parents are too worried about the excessive. Basically a two-year-old child was in the phase transformation or change in a very significant form. Therefore, children have a strong incentive to explore their world with all senses. Energy that seemed to have no end is also a feature of the children at this age. Child’s skill in coordinating a rudimentary body also adds to the high activity of children who are always energetic. Perhaps you see that your child appears to be a child who is too active (overactive).
Whereas, in reality only one of 20 active toddlers who are diagnosed having Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder or popular with the name of ADHD. If you are looking back over the trace, a toddler with ADHD has a history of active baby who is always an intense and very powerful. They are also very sensitive to sound and other stimulation, especially when your toddler starts the second age.
All you have to do if your toddler has this ADHD, do not present a stimulation, but you must give a calming activity, so that the child can pause and focus on something in a longer time. For example, you are able to read a picture-book for your child, so he or she is able to see interesting pictures. To calm the child, you can also invite him or her to play with play dough or plastic in. You are also able to get your child to do physical activities like running, walking backward, jump or other variations of the movement. The vital thing is to train the toddler listening to the command given and train regulatory body?s children.
Other disorders that can be seen is the low motor activity in the toddler, that is, the very opposite of an overactive child. Children who experience such disorders can be categorized as less active children (under activity). Usually children who have these disorders preferred to sit as well as choose the observer of their environment.
If your child is including a child who is less active, you have to give praise and support him / her when he or she followed the movement of friends like spinning or jumping. You are required to provide the child a variety of innovative physical activities that fit their interests to their physical health. You are able to take her dancing, running, jumping or gymnastics. However, you do not need to impose him if he did not want to do that activity.
If your toddler continues to refuse a variety of physical activities that you offered, try to consult a pediatrician to decide if your toddler experience health troubles or depression. If the difficulty is not due to lack of stimulation, but because the child is too long to watch television every day, or he / she is used to being in the stroller every time you take him / her out of the house, or you too often forbid the child to do new things for him / her, then all you need to do is change the pattern of toddler care. You have to provide your toddlers more freedom to explore.
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Tags: overactive
Posted in Children · February 12th, 2010 · Comments (0)
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