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Read About Dealing With Child Issues In Divorce And Parenting Plans

Discover about dealing with child issues in divorce and Parenting Plans

Parents who do not have health benefits for their children can apply for affordable health care benefits through Healthy Kids and KidCare. Qualified families can enroll their children by completing a one page application, attaching income verification documents and sending it to Healthy Kids or KidCare anytime during the year. Applications can be completed on line at healthykids.org/apply or calling 1-888-540-KIDS to receive an application in the mail. Children enrolled in the program receive regular doctor’s visits, immunizations and routine vision and hearing screening.

Beginning October 1, 2008 the statutory changes to the Shared Parental Responsibility Act place the initial burden upon the parents to work together to create a document, called a parenting plan, to control the relationship between the parents and the children.

The parenting plan has two components: (1) Decision-Making and (2) Sleeping Arrangements. Parents are not required to make every decision together. Studies show that parents after they are divorced, roughly fall into three categories of co-parenting relationships. Parents should analyze their specific co-parenting relationship and type of communications they have between them.

Approximately 25% – 30% of the parents have a cooperative co-parental relationship. This means that they cooperate by joint planning, flexibility of schedule, and coordination of children’s schedules and activities.

More than half of parents settle into parallel parenting. This means there is emotional disengagement, low conflict and minimal communications about the children. While this is less optimal for children than cooperative co-parenting, children do thrive in these arrangements.

The remaining 20% of the parents have a relationship of conflict with poor communication and little cooperation.

There is now a legal presumption that parents going through the legal process of dissolution of marriage need mandatory intervention. The minimum mandatory parenting course is four hours. The goal is to provide education early in the divorce process about the effects on the children and to minimize the consequences to the children.

In addition to the four hour mandatory parenting course, there are many community based programs. Parent effectiveness training courses for eight weeks, support groups, individual sessions are commonly available. The advantage to these courses taken by both parents is that they then share mutual information to proceed in a co-parenting manner.

The reality is that a Florida kid is entitled to minimally competent parents. The key is to reduce conflict. If the one parent wants to participate in legal and emotional conflict, rather than interventions, then that parent is acting against the child’s best interest. The courts look to determine which parent is reducing conflict and which parent is not.

If the breakdown of the marriage is due to infidelity, financial misappropriation or similar trust problems, then it is easy to identify that trust must be rebuilt for the parties to communicate, co-parent and plan for amicable resolution. Without addressing the issue of trust the ability to resolve issues amicably will not work.

Tags: children issues, divorce, divorce parentingparenting after divorce, parenting plans
Posted in Legal · March 2nd, 2010 · Comments (0)

Discover About Power And Control In Divorce

Learn about Power and Control in divorce

Power and control issues may be part of the dynamics of the inter-personal relationship of the marital partners or more significant pathology accompanying complex individual psychological and addiction problems. This is a relationship issue exacerbated by the breakdown of the marriage and the emotional divorce.

Parents who are divorcing come with the baggage of the emotional hurt and anger related to the divorce, and the interplay of beliefs and communication patterning. The communication and conflict resolution is likely to be lacking Either or both parents may say the other is unreasonable. In response, they may take a firm stand that, the other parent, seems unreasonable. Thus, both may appear to be unreasonable to the other. Such perceptions add to their resolve. Standing firm appears to be unreasonable and rigid to others and causes that parent to remain firm and rigid. This pattern is one of self-sustaining conflict. For example one parent is more of a disciplinarian and the other parent becomes more permissive in response. The stricter the one parent becomes, the more permissive the other parent becomes. The extremes are not either?s real positions, but the power and control struggle pushes each into rigid reactions.

One there is identification of this issue as an issue by either party, even if there is a denial of any validity to the claim, both parties should enter into a stipulation prior to proceeding to a regarding evaluation, intervention, monitoring, protections and consequences.

Family lawyers see this pattern repeatedly in a legal dissolution of marriage, whether this is whether a child should attend public or private school, play contact sports, or go to bed a certain hour. The key is to educate the client as to the real issue-power and control, and that it really does not involved the child or parenting. If power and control issues permeate the parents relationship, a professional evaluation may be indicated for many reasons; the parties will benefit from the evaluation findings and recommendations, a plan for future may be developed that serves the best interest of the individuals, the marriage and the children, and, if there is a problem and no compliance with interventions, immediate protections can take place. Ultimately, if it becomes detrimental issue impacting the children?s safety and well being, the evaluation and testimony from the expert will be admissible by prior agreement, if there is any violation of following the expert?s recommendations. It may be that the expert determines that the children need to be evaluated to see if there is damage to them and to determine appropriate treatment and interventions for the children and the entire family.

Immediate and competent intervention and individual and family counseling should be recommended to focus the parties on a solution and new way to interact. The parents need skilful training and education and a refocus to the best interest of the child and the detriment to the child of their course of action. The parties need a well-defined and structured communication plan which can be accomplished through a therapeutic mediation process.

Tags: dissolution of marriage, divorce, divorce control, divorce power, divorce problems
Posted in Children · February 12th, 2010 · Comments (0)